Priorities and Decisions: Open and Shut Doors

It's been said that prayer is the way we learn God's priorities and direction for our lives. So when we've been praying for guidance, how then are we to interpret our circumstances?  Obviously the Bible records many accounts where circumstances looked bleak but were leading to a glorious conclusion (see Naomi or Joseph), or conversely where circumstances looked good but were actually snares (see the Gibeonite Deception).

In recent posts, we've had quite a conversation going about circumstances, faith, and obedience to God's Word. I wanted to explore the process of prayer first and then talk about circumstances, but I decided to flip-flop the order because of these conversations. When considering circumstances, it's common for Christians to speak of open or shut doors. When something (or someone) looks favorable and an opportunity presents itself, it's viewed as an open door. When something (or someone) is not cooperative (or even present!), it's viewed as a closed door. But this simplistic perspective is not always the wisest method. As Henry Blackaby writes in Hearing God's Voice, it's imperative to view open and shut doors against the plumb line of Scripture.

The problem with open doors is the emphasis is erroneously placed on the door rather than on God. Some people enter open doors under the mistaken assumption that God only allows good opportunities to come their way. Therefore, any good opportunity that comes along must be from God. Looking for open doors can appear easier than developing a relationship with God. Various opportunities, including questionable business opportunities and marriage proposals, can be treated as open doors. As you might imagine, this can often lead to disastrous results!

If decision-making were based entirely on open doors, people would not need a relationship with God; they could merely become "door watchers." Moses saw an open door to deliver a Hebrew being oppressed by an Egyptian. He went through it, and it cost him forty years wandering in the wilderness (Exod. 2:11-15). King Saul seized an opportunity to offer an unauthorized sacrifice to God, and it cost him his kingdom (1 Sam. 13:8-9). King David stumbled through an open door to an improper relationship with Bathsheba, and his house was filled with violence and heartache for the rest of his life (2 Sam. 11). Conversely, David twice had the opportunity to murder King Saul. Doing so would have removed his greatest enemy and opened the door for his rightful place as king. Yet both times David wisely recognized the opportunity before him was not from God (1 Sam. 24, 26). Simply entering an open door without checking to see if God opened it can bring catastrophic consequences.

Therefore, if we as single Christian women are asked out by an unbelieving man, we know that this open door is not from God because God's word commands that believers be equally yoked and more importantly that women who have the freedom to make their own choices in marriage marry only in the Lord (1 Cor. 7:39). Yes, we desire to get married. Yes, this is a man asking us out. But this door cannot be viewed as an answer to prayer, because prayer is the means of aligning ourselves with God's will.

More on that next time. I hope you were encouraged by Henry Blackaby's clarification.

Comments

[jenny]

Great stuff Carolyn! I know that I have used the "open/closed door" thing when talking to others, but you are so right that it's got to be an open door that aligns with God's will that we know of already. I love Mr Blackaby's reference to door watchers - that's so spot on!
Thanks again for your encouraging blog. Blessings to you and all.

[manet]

I agree with what Mr. Blackaby stressed out. It just can't be "God's (decretive) will" if it goes against "His (declared) will". I am very thankful that we took up this topic on God's decretive and declared will about a year and a half ago because it cleared up all erroneous notions about what God's will is. Deuteronomy 29:29 says that: "The secret things belong to the LORD our God, but the things revealed belong to us and to our sons forever, that we may observe all the words of this law." We must go after God's declared will, because that is what is revealed for us. We must not be too busy finding out what God's decretive will is, we must not be too busy looking for "signs". Anyway, whatever happens in our lives is surely from God (His sovereignty) and He always has his perfect purpose behind every event.

[Jessica]

Dear Carolyn,

I can't thank you enough for the opportunity to share your site presents to us who are single. It is like having a continuous heart to heart talk with a girlfriend all day about the things that bother us.

Now, I always struggle with Paul's statement that 'believers should not be yoked together with unbelievers.' Wasn't this statement specific to the Corinthian context due to the prevailing immorality in the society? How then do we explain Esther's marriage to a pagan king? Or Jacob's marriage to Rachel who worshipped her Dad's idols? Most of the men God used in scripture seem to have been married to women who did not necessarily worship Yahweh. Would God contradict himself? Please explore this further and share your thoughts with us.

[Vanessa]

wow! wow! wow!
that's all I can say. Boy, God really knew I needed to hear this.

I have struggled sometimes with open and closed doors, because there are times when doors apear closed and we are called to knock and keep koncking until it opens. We are called to fight for something in the midst of opposition. And then, like you said, there are open doors that God does not want us to walk through.

I want to live a life guided by God's truth, that will give me courage to go through closed doors and walk away from open ones.

[Rebekah]

Girl talk has an excellent post on singleness as part of their book club just now. :)

[Emily]

It depends on your definition of dating. Dating doesn't always lead to marriage. Sometimes it could be quite fun and a good learning experience to go out with a safe person who doesn't share your faith. One night at Starbuck's sitting across from each other and talking is not going to lead to marriage or throw you into a lovesick frenzy.