No Appetite for Noise

Ah, I feel so much better knowing that it's not just me. Other people find dining out to be very stressful these days, too.

It's not because of rising prices or rising calories counts. It's because of the rising noise levels in restaurants. People can't hear each other and the strain of conducting a conversation drains all the pleasure out of eating out. So it was with HUGE satisfaction that I read last Sunday's Washington Post magazine article by restaurant critic Tom Sietsema, "No Appetite for Noise." Here are some interesting excerpts:

ACCORDING TO THE ZAGAT SURVEY, whose familiar burgundy restaurant guides cover 42 markets throughout the United States, noise ranks second, just behind service, as the response to the query: "What irritates you most about dining out?"

"A certain level of noise people consider to be exciting or good energy," says Tim Zagat, the guide's founder. "Once it gets so loud you can't hear yourself chew, it's over the top."

The cause of the clatter is just about everywhere a diner glances these days. In a restaurant's hard floors. On its naked tables. At the high ceilings. In other words, the blame for all the noise comes from the clean, slick and modern look favored by so many restaurant operators and their customers . . .

Noisy restaurants affect more than just the ears. Loud sounds can elevate blood pressure, increase breathing rates, intensify the effects of alcohol and make sleep difficult -- even after the noise ceases. At certain elevated levels, some people can experience dizziness and even nausea.

I never felt lightheaded or sick to my stomach at Zaytinya, one of the loudest restaurants in the city, but I did find myself eating faster than usual, raising my voice to be heard and assuming the posture of the Hunchback of Notre Dame as I bent into the table to hear what my tablemates were saying. . .

Exposure to noise may be hardest on restaurant workers, who spend more time in a dining room than do the people they wait on. "Theoretically," says Robert W. Sweetow, director of audiology and professor of otolaryngology at the University of California in San Franscisco, "the sound levels over time are loud enough to get impaired hearing." (Otolaryngology is the branch of medicine dealing with ear, nose and throat disorders.) . . .

According to Sweetow, sounds louder than 80 decibels are potentially hazardous. Which brings up another side effect of loud restaurants. "You have to ask, what is the emotional impact?" he says. The physician, who treats patients with hearing disorders, says many clients don't go to restaurants for fear of embarrassing themselves, because they can't understand what the waiter is saying or have trouble following a table conversation. "It's a big problem."

It definitely is! I make a habit of asking restaurants to turn down the blaring music or lower the TV volume near me. But I also avoid certain restaurants because the noise level is unnerving. So this raises an important point. Since this article confirms what I've long suspected--noise is on the increase--we have to ask ourselves is the fellowship or outreach we expect over a restaurant table really going to occur? Obviously there are times when you go out to a place because you really love the food and maybe deep conversation isn't a priority. But most of us go out because there's someone we want to spend time with over food--a new neighbor, a colleague, a friend from church or school, family members. If we're strategically investing time in these relationships, will a noisy restaurant undermine that purpose?

It's another reason that opening our homes to offer hospitality and good cheer is so important. When we practice hospitality (Romans 12:13), we are honoring Scripture, providing the ambiance for relationships to grow, and giving our hurting ears some rest in this noisy world.

UPDATE: I received some contributions with good ideas for hospitality and negotiating restaurants, so I've added those for everyone's benefit.

Comments

[ben]

I'd been noticing this phenomenon lately too and was glad to see the Post address it. I only wish the article had longer lists of the unusually loud/quiet locations (and maybe some more moderately priced ones as well). At least the park bench outside Eastern Market is quiet (except for the passing trucks).

[Andrew Moody]

I came to your blog via Challies a la carte ;-)

I appreciate your comments, and have found that this past year I have tried to organize meals in people's homes rather than at restaurants for this very reason. You can't relax and enjoy decent conversation at most restaurants. Plus, if it's a popular spot, there is pressure to finish your meal and get out to free up the table.

Two years ago I saw that a number of families in the church where I pastor were going out to eat together after the morning service in order to have time to fellowship. Sometimes there would be 20-30 people trying to go to the same place to sit together, which is not an easy task. So, instead of all going out somewhere, spending a bunch of money, and going through the headache of trying to sit together and fellowship, I started inviting families to eat at the church building every week. At first 3-4 families took me up on the offer. Now, at least half of the congregation stays for lunch every Lord's Day. One of the ladies plans the menu and emails the church the week before letting people know what to bring (casserole, baked potatoes, etc).

It has provided us with a wonderful avenue for quality fellowship!

[GUNNY HARTMAN]

On top of all that, so many pipe in the loud music!

I hate it. As a pastor, it's often convenient to have lunch meetings with folks, but top of my list of criteria is a place we can hear each other.

[julie]

Oh Carolyn, you are most definitely not alone! I too am often very agitated about this loud music thing. And here in Texas, it's not just restaurants, unfortunately. It's everywhere - dept stores, grocery stores, coffee shops, public restrooms, lobbies of office buildings and hotels, malls and shopping centers(even outside in the parking lot there are loudspeakers playing music ? go figure!). I find that while shopping I can't think clearly to make decisions. If a song comes on that I particularly don't like, I have to leave a store because I just cannot take either the lyrics or the blasting music. I think it is the height of rudeness. People have so many different ideas about music, so who decides what we all have to listen to? And why isn't it ever classical?! The other thing is TVs - flat screens everywhere. Here the doctor's offices have them and even the dentist has one on the ceiling above your chair so that when you recline you can watch TV. Can we not be away from our TVs for 1 hour? Can we not have one moment of quiet? I am concerned too about the impact of so much unrelenting noise on our minds and hearts.

[Linda T.]

For our family, this is also a consideration when we have to dine out with young children. It's harder on them to practice self-control and table manners when the environment is rowdy, fast-paced, and (as they often perceive it) tension filled. Why pay for that kind of experience?
Linda

[Susanna Rose]

Know what though? We NEED to keep some restaurants around that have a high noise level so that those of us with little ones can feel free to go out for dinner without having to feel stressed out the entire time that possible fusses or cries might disturb everyone else around us! The only restaurants my husband and I will go to when we take our rambunctious toddler out with us for dinner are these very noisy places!!:)