Radical Womanhood

Reflecting on Words

The blogosphere is well-populated with summaries and links to materials from this weekend's Desiring God conference, "The Power of Words and the Wonder of God." But I want to add my two cents because I think the topic of words is an important one for women. Though I'm not sure the old adage of women using twice as many words in a day than men is entirely accurate, I do think our words carry a lot of weight. They either build up or tear down the relationships we are commanded to nurture. That's why I want to highlight some of this weekend's messages for you.

Sinclair Ferguson mined James 3 for us in "The Tongue, the Bridle, and the Blessing." There were so many well-crafted gems in his message that I couldn't keep up with my notes. One sentence that stood out to me was when he said that the misuse of the tongue can render all of the other graces of life negligible. That's not a direct quote, but the essence of it. He also gave us twenty Jonathan Edwards-style resolutions that can be developed from the book of James. I wrote down about a third and got hopelessly behind in doing so. Fortunately, Justin Taylor posted them all on his blog. In the end, Dr. Ferguson wrapped it up with the simple plea, "Be merciful to me, a tongue-using sinner." Amen and amen.

Mark Driscoll's message was no doubt startling on several levels to people, which it was intended to be. He spoke on "Christ, Controversy and Cutting Words." But toward the end of his message, he spoke candidly on the atmosphere and opposition of the city in which he ministers. I was stunned at what his church is enduring right now. (You'll have to listen -- it's in point five.) In that context, he reminded us to pray for our shepherds. He told us to pray for our shepherds more than we criticize them, or email them, or blog about them. And pray for their wives to endure the criticism and to be steadfast encouragers to their husbands. Amen and amen.

Finally, I want to highlight Paul Tripp's message, "War of Words." If you've never read his book by the same name, this message is a must. You can read it, listen to it, or watch it (and I highly recommend watching it because Paul's physical comedy won't be as meaningful without it). The take-home point is important: I am my greatest communication problem. For the single ladies, I also want to point out a hilarious riff on dating toward the end of the message. Paul said, "Western culture dating, in my opinion, is just a step above used-car sales."

This is just a sample of the wonderful material presented at this weekend's conference. Thanks to the generosity of Desiring God, you can read, watch, or listen to all of the messages and panel discussions that are now posted on their website. There's also a goldmine of information in the speaker interview videos that were created to promote the conference.

(Photo: Paul Tripp at the conference.)

Support for Jubilee Campaign

I'm headed today to Minneapolis for the Desiring God 2008 National Conference. I have the immense privilege of doing my first book-signing there for the debut of Radical Womanhood. I just received my advance copies of the book -- I can't believe it's finally here!

As exciting as it is to see the book in print, I am equally excited to announce what its sales will support. My first book, Did I Kiss Marriage Goodbye?, supports both Shared Hope International and Covenant Mercies from a portion of the sales proceeds. This time, a portion of the proceeds from Radical Womanhood will go to the Jubilee Campaign USA.

Jubilee Campaign USA promotes the human rights and religious liberty of ethnic and religious minorities in countries which imprison, terrorize or otherwise oppress them. Jubilee also advocates against the exploitation of children, paying particular attention to the sex industry in Asia. It was founded in the early '90s by a friend of mine, Ann Buwalda. Ann is a dedicated, talented, and hard-working lawyer who makes Jubilee her personal ministry. Jubilee works to free child slaves in India, to aid victims of religious persecution in Pakistan, to advocate for freedom in North Korea, to care for orphans of religious violence in Indonesia, and lobbies at the United Nations and Capitol Hill for human rights and religious freedom.

I encourage you to take a moment to read further about Jubilee and consider how you can get involved.

An Ode to Clotted Cream

When I visited Cornwall, England, in 2003, I was all about the cream tea. I was with friends who knew my penchant for tea and they had arranged for a special tea on my birthday. However, every time I saw a sign for tea in a shop window, I stopped immediately and went in. Why wait for just one special experience when you can have a variety of them?!

That's why I knew I had encountered a kindred spirit when I came across an article in the Washington Post travel section titled "Getting Creamed in Cornwall:"

I had fallen madly in love. With clotted cream.

Yes, I swooned over something that sounds like you should put a Band-Aid on it rather than eat it. But, oh, the stuff was glorious: unctuous, buttery, rich. Every afternoon of my trip, I slathered it on scones snatched from tiered silver trays in hushed hotel tearooms.

And, like most of those smitten with a new love, I didn't bother to ask for details. I vaguely assumed it was heavy cream, whipped almost into butter but stopped just short of that transformation.

Returning home to the United States, I pined for clotted cream. It wasn't to be found at even the swankiest hotel tea services, where whipped cream was foisted on me instead. That started the questions: What, actually, is this rich, golden goo? How is it made? And why are the Brits keeping it all for themselves?

On a recent trip to England, I set out to find the answers -- and the best clotted cream the country has to offer.

As it says in the sub-headline: "A search for the best clotted cream is the perfect excuse to explore the English countryside." The rest of the high-calorie expedition can be read online.

Photo By R. Paul Herman, courtesy of The Washington Post

national punctuation day

i am proud to announce that it is national punctuation day a day in which we celebrate those little marks that help us communicate with punctuation we know the difference between a plural and a possessive for example however apostrophe abuse is making that distinction nearly impossible these days as people routinely use apostrophes for plural words and other things i can rant about anyway i found it took me nearly twice as long to type this because i keep having to go back and erase the punctuation that inherently longs to participate in such a blog post nonetheless heres to national punctuation day

and heres a shoutout to the man who gave us a modern form of punctuation the beloved emoticon ha ha without punctuation you have no idea if i mean that or not

:-)

happy national punctuation day may you never ever abuse the poor apostrophe

cheers

Women's Discipleship Group

A few years ago, my church developed a nine-month discipleship course for single women. The twice-monthly, two-hour sessions are designed to provide a basic overview of Christian issues from a feminine perspective. Although we are mentoring single women in this course, the materials really are useful for every woman. Since many of our homework materials are available online for free, I thought I would post these materials for anyone who might be interested in using them, too. We're three sessions into the course, so I'll post those sessions now and, Lord willing, update them each week as we go along.

First Week: Introduction
This meeting is an administrative meeting, where we go over the purposes of the course, the commitment expected from each member, and the schedule. Then we get to know each other, sharing brief introductions. This is also where the course notebooks are handed out and the homework for each session is outlined. The notebook contains the audio material and articles that supplement the two core texts for the program, Feminine Appeal by Carolyn Mahaney and Did I Kiss Marriage Goodbye? by yours truly. (If you decide to organize one of these courses, feel free to poke fun at my book title. I do, too, and it helps women relax about reading such an ominously titled text! I make sure they understand that though the title expresses a common fear among women, the substance of the book is really about how to apply Proverbs 31 to a single woman's life.) Then we note the homework for the following week, making sure everyone knows to have these materials read before our next meeting and highlighting the Scripture memory verse.

Second Week: The Gospel
In this session, we focus on the gospel as the foundation for change. Many of us can assume the gospel, but we really don't apply it on a daily basis. During our discussion, we talk about why we need to remind ourselves daily about the gospel, what it means to preach to yourself instead of listening to yourself, and what is looks like to finish well in light of the gospel. At the conclusion of the meeting, we also write down a spiritual goal for the course, to be reviewed nine months later. Our homework that formed the basis of our discussion was:
-Living the Cross Centered Life by C.J. Mahaney, intro, chs. 1 & 2
-Did I Kiss Marriage Goodbye? Ch. 1 and Afterword
-Memory verse: John 3:16-17

Third Session: Spiritual Disciplines
In this meeting, we look at why we need to pursue spiritual disciplines for growth. We look at each of the disciplines in an in-depth manner, including meditation, personal worship solitude/retreats, journaling, prayer, Scripture memory, fasting, and confession. Then we look at Titus 2 and why this chapter calls women (and men!) to certain practices--it's all to make the gospel attractive. If women don't have prayer or accountability partners currently, we encourage them to develop this practice during this course. Finally, we introduce the quiet time accountability sheets in this session. Each of the women is to write down the duration of her personal devotions and the spiritual disciplines pursued, and even the topics studied, if desired. The goal of this accountability is not to point to performance (or solicit condemnation), but to use these sheets to reveal the ways we do (or do not) pursue the Lord for growth. Our homework for this discussion was:
-"Pursuing a Passion for God through Spiritual Disciplines: Learning from Jonathan Edwards" by Donald Whitney, chapter 5  of A God-Entranced Vision of All Things
-"Confession: Doorway to Life" by John Loftness, Disciplines for Life, ch. 6
- Feminine Appeal by Carolyn Mahaney, chapters 1 & 9
- Memory verse: 1 Timothy 4:7-8

Fear Not

The headlines these days are quite sobering. With major companies failing, with Wall Street panicking, and with international economies reacting to our financial tailspin, fear seems to loom large. All the problems that contributed to our current situation were in place when everything seem prosperous and happy -- we're just reaping the consequences now. But those consequences are immediate and tangible, for sure. Though I claim no special financial or economic insight, I do know two things we Christians are supposed to do in nervous times like these: 1) fear not, and 2) Intercede in prayer.

I count 34 instances of the command to "fear not" in the ESV translation of the Bible. Sometimes this phrase was directed to individuals, as to Abram ("After these things the word of the LORD came to Abram in a vision: 'Fear not, Abram, I am your shield; your reward shall be very great'" in Gen. 15:1) or to the shepherds in Bethlehem ("And the angel said to them, 'Fear not, for behold, I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord'" in Luke 2:10-11). But many more such exhortations are directed to the people of God, either in a historical connotation, such as Moses to the Israelites, or a prophetic connotation, as in the many exhortations in the book of Isaiah to fear not. ("For I, the LORD your God, hold your right hand; it is I who say to you, 'Fear not, I am the one who helps you.'"--Isaiah 41:13.)

All of these "fear not" commands have one very important element in common: they are all based in the character or work of God. We are not commanded to avoid fear because there were relief measures offered by our government, or a rally on Wall Street, or any other man-made solution. We are to avoid succumbing to fear because our God holds us in His right hand. It is His great pleasure to give us the kingdom. He is the first and the last, and He holds the keys to death. He is our Rock and upon His Word, we can rest in confidence.

Knowing that, I want to be like the widow with two copper coins, who gave all she had to live on to the purposes of Christ. I want to be like the widow who trusted Elijah and gave him food from her last meal. Faced with personal loss, these two women decided to be a blessing to others. There may be some tough times upon us now and in the immediate future, but I pray we Christians will demonstrate remarkable faith in God by avoiding hoarding and giving generously to the glory of God. May we stand out from our culture because of our trust in the Lord.

In the meantime, let us intercede for our leaders. Romans 13 says government leaders are God's servants for our good --a blessing of His common grace to restrain evil and promote good. We need to pray for righteous leaders, for wisdom to make sound decisions, and for their self-control to rule for the common good and not personal benefit. Certainly some very hard decisions are being made right now. Let us fear not the short-term consequences, but keep our eyes fixed on the eternal truths about God and His kingdom purposes.

A Fresh Perspective on the Atonement

While I was in the Dallas area this weekend, I attended Grace Church of Frisco, TX. This past Sunday, senior pastor Craig Cabaniss kicked off a series on the atonement. He began the series in Exodus 12, explaining that we can see the concept of substitutionary atonement even in the Old Testament. As he taught, he addressed two points I had never considered and/or noticed before.

The first point was that the lamb's blood on the doorways of the Israelite homes in Egypt was not to signal that God's favorite people lived there or something so flattering to the Israelites. It was to show who was covered by the blood of the sacrificial lamb. In fact, in Ezekiel 20:5-11, the Bible makes it clear that the Israelites were idolaters, just as the Egyptians were. But for the sake of His holy name before the watching nations, God acted on their behalf. I had not noticed that commentary on Exodus from Ezekiel before.

The second point was that when Jesus celebrated the Passover supper with His disciples, there is no mention of the meal's centerpiece -- the Passover lamb. There's only the Lord Jesus, breaking the bread and sharing the wine and declaring how this meal is to be done in His memory, the memory of the true Passover Lamb. I guess it's possible to get so familiar with a story that you neglect to notice obvious points like this, but it was a fresh insight for me.

 It's an outstanding message, which you can download for free from Grace Church's website.

Greetings from Dallas

This weekend, approximately 150 women braved the weather forecasts to attend the Radical Womanhood conference at Southwestern Seminary, hosted by Redeemer Church of Fort Worth. We were fortunate -- the storm passed well to the east of the event so all we had was a mildly rainy day. However, our thoughts and prayers remained with those in the path of tropical storm Ike.

The conference organizers took my book cover as a decorating theme for the weekend, even down to including shoes as a table centerpiece! It was a treat to get to know more sisters in the Lord.

I'm spending a few more days in the area so I can collect hugs and kisses from my nieces. One of the highlights of my weekend was taking my niece, Stephanie, for her first double-digit birthday tea. The owners of Lavender House in McKinney, Texas, were willing to extend their schedule so we could enjoy a leisurely afternoon together. Stephanie has been looking forward to this event ever since her older sister turned ten two years ago. I can't believe my "niblings" are growing up so fast! Really, if children didn't grow up seemingly overnight, we could all kid ourselves that we haven't aged at all!

(Photos: The worship team for Redeemer's Radical Womanhood conference; the post-conference lunch with the event organizers; and the Lavender House.)

The Chromosomal Barrier

It's been an incredibly hectic week -- with a busy, potentially hurricane-soaked weekend ahead. But despite the many distractions, I kept thinking about two pieces I read in yesterday's Washington Post. The first was about how Trig Palin is helping to break "the chromosomal barrier." As columnist Michael Gerson noted, Trig was another first in this history-making presidential campaign.

In addition to Barack Obama making history as the first African American to be nominated for president and Sarah Palin taking her shotgun to the glass ceiling, there was a third civil rights barrier broken at the political conventions this year.

Trig Paxson Van Palin -- pronounced by his mother "beautiful" and "perfect" and applauded at center stage of the Republican convention -- smashed the chromosomal barrier. And it was all the more moving for the innocence and indifference of this 4-month-old civil rights leader.

It was not always this way. John F. Kennedy's younger sister Rosemary, who was born in 1918, had a mental disability that was treated as a family secret. For decades Rosemary was hidden as a "childhood victim of spinal meningitis." Joseph Kennedy subjected his daughter to a destructive lobotomy when she was 23. It was the remarkable Eunice Kennedy Shriver who talked openly of her sister's condition in 1962 and went on to found the Special Olympics as a summer camp in her back yard -- part of a great social movement of compassion and inclusion.

Trig's moment in the spotlight is a milestone of that movement. But it comes at a paradoxical time. Unlike what is accorded African Americans and women, civil rights protections for people with Down syndrome have rapidly eroded over the past few decades. Of the cases of Down syndrome diagnosed by prenatal testing each year, about 90 percent are eliminated by abortion. Last year the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists recommended universal, early testing for Down syndrome -- not just for older pregnant women. Some expect this increased screening to reduce the number of Down syndrome births to something far lower than the 5,500 we see today, perhaps to fewer than 1,000.

The wrenching diagnosis of 47 chromosomes must seem to parents like the end of a dream instead of the beginning of a life. But children born with Down syndrome -- who learn slowly but love deeply -- are generally not experienced by their parents as a curse but as a complex blessing. And when allowed to survive, men and women with an extra chromosome experience themselves as people with abilities, limits and rights. Yet when Down syndrome is detected through testing, many parents report that genetic counselors and physicians emphasize the difficulties of raising a child with a disability and urge abortion.

This is properly called eugenic abortion -- the ending of "imperfect" lives to remove the social, economic and emotional costs of their existence. And this practice cannot be separated from the broader social treatment of people who have disabilities. By eliminating less perfect humans, deformity and disability become more pronounced and less acceptable. Those who escape the net of screening are often viewed as mistakes or burdens. A tragic choice becomes a presumption -- "Didn't you get an amnio?" -- and then a prejudice. And this feeds a social Darwinism in which the stronger are regarded as better, the dependent are viewed as less valuable, and the weak must occasionally be culled.

On the same day, the Post carried a sad tribute to the father of an adult Down syndrome child who died trying to rescue his son. Not only did Thomas Vander Woude allow his son, Joseph, to be born 20 years ago, he gave his own life when danger struck two decades later. On Monday, Joseph was working with his father in the yard when he accidentally fell into the septic tank. While waiting for the rescue workers, Vander Woude jumped in the tank, submerging himself in sewage so he could push his son up from below and keep his head above the muck. When the rescue workers arrived, they pulled the two out, but Thomas was unconscious and efforts to revive him were unsuccessful. His son, Joseph, is reported to be in critical condition in the hospital with double pneumonia.

It's hard to reconcile these two articles and the vast difference in perspectives about the worth of children like Trig or Joseph. I grieve for what a double-minded culture we've become. We are pro-life when it comes to baby seals or endangered species, but not when it comes to human beings with development disabilities. We campaign for women's rights in our own nation but ignore the estimated 100 million missing girls worldwide who have been victims of sex-selective abortions. We seem incapable of recognizing the hypocrisy of protecting a "woman's right to choose," even if such a choice is made at the expense of another's life--and a female's life at that!

Michael Gerson is correct in saying we have have embraced eugenic, Social Darwinistic concepts--the very ideas that were at the core of Nazi Germany. And it's no surprise, given the strong embrace of eugenics by Planned Parenthood founder, Margaret Sanger. It is a bitter harvest, indeed.

Love Expressed by Obedience

My friend, Bill Farley, is the senior pastor of Grace Christian Fellowship in Spokane, which is one of the newest members of the Sovereign Grace family of churches. He is also the author of Outrageous Mercy: Rediscover the Radical Nature of Christianity (a revised edition is coming out soon from P&R Publishing). I was reading his book recently and was struck by the beauty of this truth about spiritual warfare. In a chapter called "God's Spiritual Boot Camp," Bill examined how the three cardinal virtues--faith, hope, and love--were the basic spiritual weapons of Jesus on earth. "I want to focus on these, rather than power encounters with the devil, because in my experience, all our efforts to resist the devil are of no avail unless we grow in faith, hope, and love," he wrote.

The third weapon Jesus used to conquer the devil was the obedience that proceeds from love, and by this same means the church will ultimately conquer. "For they loved not their lives even until death" (Rev. 12:11 ESV).

I have saved the most important weapon for last. To destroy the devil Jesus did not confront him. He did not aggressively attack him. Instead, he was passive toward his adversary and expressed his love for God by obedience. The devil conquered Adam by inciting disobedience, so the Second Adam conquered the devil with absolute obedience.

In short, Jesus conquered the devil by dying; the cross was Jesus' ultimate weapon. In other words, Jesus conquered the devil by letting the devil destroy him.

I just heard the story of a group of Christians in India that meet together regularly to pray for strength to die for Jesus. They face the prospect of death and physical harm every day. This weapon is real to them. It is not to those of us who live in freedom.

Love expressing itself through obedience is God's secret wisdom. It is foolishness to the worldly mind, but it is foundational to all gospel wisdom. ... When we talk about spiritual warfare, often the weapon of love expressing itself as obedience is the last weapon discussed. We exhort one another to rebuke the devil, cast out evil spirits, intercede, or raise the shield of faith. These are all important, but the weapon of self-denial, the most important, is usually forgotten.