A Valentine's Day Testimony

Three years ago, I was in New Orleans to film the post-Katrina damage and document the valiant efforts of the members of Lakeview Christian Center to survive and overcome the hurricane damage. I spent way too much time in the moldy homes we were filming and lost my voice due to my allergies. That Sunday, I attended the church meeting and tried to greet people with my squeaky voice and various hand signals. At the end of the meeting, a single mother came up to introduce herself. It was obviously a short conversation. But as she turned to walk away, I felt the Lord wanted to encourage her with something specific. So I caught her attention and half-squeaked/half-whispered to her that I felt the Lord was prompting me to tell her that, in my observation, many single mothers feel disqualified for attracting a husband, but that the Lord had been faithful to provide a husband to many of my friends who were single mothers. Don't lose faith, I told her. Your circumstances do not restrict God's goodness.

For that reason, I was happy to receive an email from her a few months ago to say that she was engaged! I asked for her testimony so I could share it with you all. What follows is Mandy (Talbot) Albert's story. I pray that it will be an encouragement to you during Valentine's Day!

Our story of sin and redemption.

It will be difficult to stay on track, because there are so many testimonies in my life to be told…but I will do my best to stay on course.

When I was 26 years old I gave birth to a sweet baby boy, who was 10 weeks premature.  I was a single mom and prescription pill addict.  When my son was two years old, the Lord grabbed me and made me His.  The year was 2002, and I was sent to a faith-based rehab in Indiana, where the Lord completely removed addiction from my life.  I was separated from my son for four months and it was the most painful hurt that I had ever experienced. It was then that the Lord healed my family and taught me how to be a mother.  Looking back, I had no idea of the blessings the Lord had in store for me.

I came home from Indiana, ready for a new life.  About a year later, a childhood friend, Tracy, who was now the wife of a Sovereign Grace church pastor, invited me to a Christian event called New Attitude (now NEXT).  I fell in love with the people of this church, and eventually moved to New Orleans to be a part of Lakeview Christian Center. My son and I had found a home!  This became a season of sweet fellowship for me, but also a time of deeply desiring a husband.

By the age of four, my son began to pray for a daddy -- every day. I would pray with him, with hope, and remind him that the Lord was his Father, and that if he really needed an earthly father, the Lord would send him one in His time.  Then I would leave his room and sob.  Oh, how I remember the nights of soaked pillows, begging for the Lord to send me a husband!  I would try read between the lines of every message on marriage, to “figure out” God’s plan for me. I wrestled with discontentment.  Many nights I asked the Lord to “send me a husband or remove the desire.” Then one day the Lord clearly spoke to my heart: He had given me the desire for a husband, and He had withheld the husband.  I was to have joy in having a desire without it being fulfilled.

WHAT?!? This was revolutionary. So I prayed for the gift of a calm and quieted heart and the Lord delivered! I was content…for the most part.

Fast forward to Christmas, 2006: My cousin told me about a great guy she wants me to meet.  That wasn’t the first time I have heard about some “great guy,” so I said thanks and forgot about it for the most part.  In August, 2007, she sent me an email inviting me to have dinner at her house to meet him.  Sure…why not…it’s a free meal and I love spending time with family. 

So we drove for more than an hour to my cousin’s house. I made sure to bring my 7-year-old, high-octane deal-breaker. (My kid is always full speed ahead, so I wanted to scare this guy off quickly and avoid any unwanted heartbreak.) So we had dinner, and I don’t think we made eye contact once. The conversation was interesting. There were similarities between us: he had gone to a faith-based rehab a couple of years before I did; he had a strong desire to work with addicts and point them to the cross; and we shared some favorite authors. But more importantly, he was a gentleman and his love of the Savior was evident in our conversation. (Did I mention that his name is Randy…and mine is Mandy? Our God has a sense of humor). I told my cousin she could give him my phone number…if he asked. The first thing that I told my friends was, “If nothing else came from our dinner together, it was amazing of God to let me know that there are men like him out there!”

Well…he sent me an email and we started to exchange phone calls.  As the Lord was confirming that this man was to be my husband, the most unexpected thing happened.  In the midst of 8+ years of prayer (by me and countless others) now being answered, my heart was hardening, and I was becoming apathetic.  The first three months of our courtship was one of the most difficult seasons of my life (second only to leaving my son with my parents for rehab).  This man was pursuing me in a biblically sound way, he and my son loved each other, he was kind and giving…and I was cold.  It was a time of spiritual darkness that I had not experienced since I had become a believer.  My friends who had invited me to New Attitude, helped me to join Lakeview Christian Center, and moved me to New Orleans, were now doing everything in their power to stop me from ruining this relationship. They invited Randy to New Orleans to develop a friendship with him.  They assured him that he had never met the “real” Mandy.  Every time he would leave town, Randy would tell the Lord that he couldn’t do it anymore. It was too painful and too difficult.

During those three months, I spent every night sobbing, begging for the Lord to change my heart and protect that man!  In time, the Lord softened me.  Our relationship grew, and eventually Randy proposed.  There were still difficult times, and there were days where my thought life would be quite frightening.  Through it all, my hope was that the Lord would have my heart where it needed to be at the right time. In God’s kindness, our best friends were also the ones facilitating our pre-marital counseling…so not much could be hidden.

I must say that I am amazed at how the Lord has changed my heart.  I wrestled with my thoughts and self-centered cravings throughout our courtship and engagement. (James 4:1-3 on display!) In my mind, I would ascribe motives to his words and actions, and I always comparing and assuming. Thankfully, I was convicted by the Holy Spirit that this was wrong and deadly to our soon-to-be oneness. The Lord has melted my heart for this man. I no longer look for his sin --  I now look for ways to serve him...and ENJOY IT!!!!

On October 24, 2008, we were married.  These two ex-drug addicts had been redeemed in ways unimaginable.  The pastor marrying us was one of our best friends, his wife was my matron of honor, and Randy’s previous pastor and mentor was his best man. How unbelievable...only God!  God gave me a husband so amazing, so beyond my wildest imaginations…with attributes I would not have even known to ask for. I am truly blessed with a man who loves the Lord, who prays with me, who strong in areas that I am weak, who loves me, and makes me laugh uncontrollably…he is my best friend.  I don't know how God does it, but I love Randy more every day. I find myself missing him when I have been away from him for 5 minutes. He is my best friend and I am so proud to be his wife. He likes to say that he "married up" when he married me...but I know it is the other way around.  We have only been married for three months but I can't remember life without him. To top it all off, he will be adopting OUR son.  (The change it has made in my son is a testimony in and of itself.) Glory to God!

Comments

[Abbi S.]

Thank you, Carolyn; this is so encouraging! Thank you, Mandy, for your humility in sharing with us. Your story is a great reminder to me that God is in complete and loving control, even of my own deceitful heart.

[Erin]

A beautiful testimony of God's grace - thanks for posting it.

[Danielle Lombard]

I am also a single mother that attends Lakeview and it has been so kind of God to show me his love for Mandy and her son. It has given me hope and faith for my daughter and myself. It has been a blessing to see God's grace and love for Mandy and her family. God is faithful!!

[Kelly Pourciau]

Mandy's life is a constant evidence of God's grace to me. Thanks for sharing this with others.

[Cathy McKay]

Mandy,
Praise God for displaying his power and generosity and creativity so wonderfully! May God's Spirit keep working in your new family to make Jesus look great.

Thanks for sharing this Carolyn!

[donna]

This entire post was a blessing but I truly needed to read this:

"Then one day the Lord clearly spoke to my heart: He had given me the desire for a husband, and He had withheld the husband. I was to have joy in having a desire without it being fulfilled."

When I think about this, I've wanted to be a business owner for a long time but that's not fulfilled yet and I can still find joy in just the desire of opening one. Sometimes I don't want to move from the desire to having it fulfilled because the hard work will be coupled with all of the great things I see in the business itself and what it can accomplish.

Yet when it comes to marriage, never have I thought enjoy the desire, well to the extent that I know it's God given and not lust but just that contentment I can find myself struggling with and getting angry that God won't just take it away so this really put things into perspective.

Truly grateful for this testimony and that the Lord gave her the desire of her heart in His timing.

[Susanna]

Thanks for posting this story...it is beautiful and encouraging! The way Mandy struggled with hardness towards Randy reminds me so much of the way I struggled in my attitude towards my husband before we got married but I can say the exact thing as her even 5 years later...that I feel eternally blessed to be married to him and men like him and Randy...men who pursue and do not let go but persevere...are awesome role models. It shows what they are made of!

[Rachel]

Thanks for sharing your story. It humbles me how much more I need to be on my knees in prayer.

[Libby Guidry]

You have no idea how much I needed to read this today. I, a single mom of a 3 year old, desiring a husband, thinking it will never happen!!!! Thanks for posting this.

[Tami]

Thank you so much for sharing this story. She says the *exact* words that have been echoing in my mind lately -- only the Lord can melt a heart... whether it's towards Himself, or towards another person.

Glory to God indeed.

[emsolideogloria]

what an encouraging story :-) thanks for giving God the glory and being vulnerable about the ways He has changed you, Mandy.

[Christina Szrama]

WOOHOOO! :)

[Ruth Garrard]

I have known Randy since he was a little boy. His mom is one of my dearest friends. I have prayed much for him. Praise God for His faithfulness. My own 37 year old daughter is getting married in April after dealing with great adversity. We know that God does all things well IN HIS TIME.

[Hannah]

What an amazing testimony of God's grace and power! Thanks for sharing!

[Paul Lawson]

I am a middle aged single male (never married). I found this beautiful love story encouraging from my own side of gender. Thank you for sharing...ran across this blog from a list of another blogger friend of mine and viewed out of curiosity.

[KRITIKA]

PRAISE DA LORD....IT'Z A BEAUTIFUL TESTIMONY... MAY GOD BLESS U THROUGHOUT YOUR LIFE...