On the Home Front

The last of the True Woman conferences was held this past weekend in Ft. Worth, TX. Tim Challies was among the blogging team there and he brought his wife, Aileen, with him. It was a pleasure to meet Aileen after reading about her for years! You can check out what Tim posted (on momentum and on the definition of a true woman), as well as what others on the True Woman blogging team posted. But even better: the True Woman team has posted all the messages from all three events online! You can even create a True Woman event for your own church or small group by downloading the leader's kit.

I left the Ft. Worth conference thinking about something Dannah Gresh said during our panel discussion. Dannah encouraged us to begin teaching our girls at a young age about modestly, purity, and serving—and not to wait until they are young teens to guide them in forming godly values. She emphasized that the grade school to 'tween years are the prime time to shape the value systems of young girls. So I decided to be intentional about discussing the True Woman event while visiting afterward with my three nieces, who range from age 8 to 13. (They get this perspective from their mother, too, but I wanted to add my auntie input.)

With their mother's permission, I introduced my seminar topic about the challenges girls face in developing nations. I gave an overview of the issues (skipping some of the more graphic problems), and then focused on how some girls aren't allowed to go to school for either political or economic reasons. We then watched a short video produced by the New York Times about girls in Swat Valley, Pakistan, who were banned from attending school by the Taliban. I prepared them for the sobering images of Taliban justice, but I thought it was important they understand how valuable their own education freedom is in this nation. (During my seminar, I mentioned I had sent this link to them, but they hadn't had the opportunity to see it.)

Then we talked about why God wants women to manage their homes and what kinds of ministry can take place in the home--and why that's important in light of eternity. I told them how you can go much deeper in conversation in the privacy of your home, as opposed to being in restaurants, and about how the Bible portrays the home as being a discipleship center and mission field. We talked about all of that over a home-cooked meal of beef brisket (a yummy pot-roast style recipe from the New Basics Cookbook), mashed potatoes with sauteed mushrooms, steamed garlic broccoli, and pistachio pudding. The girls were all involved in creating the meal--trying new recipes together is one of our traditions. Then the next day, we invited a friend over for dinner and a home-cooked pumpkin pie with spiced hot cider. As we prepared, we talked about how to create ambiance and make a guest feel especially welcome.

I wasn't sure how much was sinking in, but I discovered even my youngest niece was listening closely. After church on Sunday, I took them to Starbucks for more discussion time. As we sat down with our drinks and muffins, I mentioned how fun it was to have this special girl time together. Abigail shot me a knowing look and said, "But shouldn't we do this at home?" 

Busted! But it was worth it to know they heard me.

Comments

[Bethany Grover]

Never underestimate your influence as an aunt! My mom's youngest sister really had a vision for me and my brothers. When she was a missionary, she sent us pics of the kids and sugarcane. When she worked in Trenton, she had us visit her and "help" take the inner city kids on a field trip. When she worked for Wycliffe in Dallas, she let me visit her and set up little interviews with retired missionaries. All that was interspersed with fun events and activities, special birthday celebrations, etc that my mom simply didn't have time to do.

The end result was not just that we caught her passion for missions, but we also had lots of great talks together about all sorts of things (church, relationships, Bible study, etc). It meant so much to us that she talked to us about grown up ideas.

So be encouraged, and keep blessing your nieces with special visits and teaching. They won't forget!

[Elaine Shutt]

I love Abigail's question! I've realized recently that most of the time when young women say they can't get together, the reason behind it is they can't meet in restaurants for financial reasons or because their children need a place to play. My mentor opens her home once a week to all the ladies in our small group (married, single, with/without kids). The conversations that take place could never happen in a public place.

[Debbie]

What a blessing to your nieces! I was challenged to begin to pray for a select group of younger women on a weekly basis and try to have some get-togethers in my home for them.

[Zinnada]

I agree. It was my AUNT who displayed Christ to me. My mom isn't a believer and so whenever I spent the night over my cousin's house, I KNEW we were going to church that Sunday. I remember so clearly how my aunt had gospel music on as she prepared my cousin and I for church. I never had a Sunday dress and I would wear my cousin's. I have tears in my eyes as I write this because God used her to plant a seed that I NEVER knew was planted until the day I accepted Him as my Savior and Lord.

ZHodges<><

[Ekaterina]

I prefer to discuss with girls different issues (instead of direct teaching that might be not clear for them), so they can think deeper.

For example, questioning them "Why purity is important for women? What happens if a girl does not care about being pure? How purity can benefit a woman?" Questions will stay in their minds and girls will be interested in searching the answers.

[Ashley Acosta]

This reminds me of what you mentioned tonight at Monte Vista Chapel about developing the Proverbs 31 traits while we wait. One of the things that brings me joy amidst many friends who are marrying is to remind myself of just that, "I'm in training, and praise God, He's allowed me to work out all the kinks while I'm single." I only wish, as you mentioned above, that I had started cultivating these traits and a pure frame of mind much earlier in my life. Even though I was raised according to the "wait for marriage" mantra, when hormones hit hard during my teens, I was not spiritually ready to handle the temptations or consequences that followed. I think as Katerina commented, discussing WHY these issues are so important and cultivating that mindset in young girls early on will make the path towards purity a much straighter and less painful one.

And I just have to say what a blessing Session 1 was tonight--more than worth the 2 hour drive. I'm so looking forward to tomorrow and the coming weeks as I read through your books. Thank you for your timely blessing. Much love from your sister in Christ.

[Drey]

I don't know how to say this any differently. I think I can see why your "hope has been deferred." God seems to be using you in a mighty way. It may be mightier than he might have been able to if your hope was realized. It's just a feeling I keep getting.
I read your postings and every time I have concluded the same thing. You have a very positive influence on me and I am over forty.
Keep it up and may God continue to bless you as he works in people's lives through you.